Crystal

"Adversity is the diamond dust with which heaven polishes its jewels"

 It takes an extremely brave person to look their challenges dead in the face and say try me! This is the particular attitude that a good friend-no-sister of mine has adopted when the pressures of the world both within and without, alight themselves on her heart. Crystal stands stoic amidst great storms, and like an eagle, rises above them every single time! She has this divine ability to tap into what seems to be boundless wisdom, and from it, retrieves the truth, and bestows it on someone without hurting them. It's and oddity since in most cases the truth feels like a piercing dagger.

 It has never been more apparent to me that her wisdom stems from a place deep within her heart where she has weathered the blows of life with celestial grace like a Queen. She reminds of one of my favorite heroines, Eowyn, a Shield Maiden whose courage and fortitude in the midst of war was second to none. I intend on keeping this short as I feel words can't describe enough the admiration and adoration I have for this particular sage, so I'll end this by saying that the wings of an angel are found on the backs of the least like people, and you are on of those people to me, Crystal! Thank you for your constant guidance. And I hope that you are blessed perpetually, and that you find it within yourself to always see eternity in an hour, and heaven in a wild flower

Your distant brother
Tshepo.

A Letter To The Count

To Monsieur Le Comte de Monte Cristo

Dear Edmond, you may be the figment of the boundless imagination of a singular gentleman named Alexandre Dumas, but you have made a particular impression on me so much so that I felt quite obliged to write to you in tribute. When I first made your acquaintance you impressed upon me the seemingly endless elation of a child in spring. Your diligent and determined love for the seas made want to explore that endless lake that Poseidon calls an abode. Your love for your master monsieur Morrel, showed me that when a young person seeks to follow before they lead, all barriers to industrial progression can crumble and that great things can be accomplished!

My dear Edmond you demonstrated to me the true meaning of love, which would be later tested, but a test which you doubtlessly weathered. Your love for your father and for your betrothed, Mercedes, demonstrated to me in crystal clear sight that a man is truly happiest when he is surrounded by those he loves. Your subsequent arrest and detaining left a rather bad taste in my mouth as reading on seemed to me as being forced to enter a dark cave with you, and I felt that there would be no light nor any way out. You were but a lad then, and your countenance, although radiating with happiness, made no impression upon the procurer de roi, so on you went Edmond, into your damnation, but you saw fit to make it your salvation.

Your struggle and strife within that abyss called the Chatteua d'ff made me cringe and shudder! The doubts which you wrestled constantly, made me pity you, but I stayed that pity for I knew that your will was stronger than the walls that ensnared you. Your battle with that spectre that rises in the hearts and minds of the disturbed soul cast a light on something that I dare not mention, and your fateful encounter with a man that I have previously described as a fallen star rising from his temporary abode, to show you the way toward the light, solidified my admiration for you. I'm sure your appreciation for this man goes without saying, but your diligence surfaced once more, and like the Abbe, you managed to concentrate the faculties of your mind into a singular cause that would alter your life forever. You showed great ingenuity and strength in the way in which you handled both the Abbe' s death and your escape, and because of it, you have seen fit to bestow upon your conspirators the fate which you thought they deserved.

Your sojourn across the Mediterranean after your escape from the cemetery of the Chatteua d'iff, was carried out with the poise of a man who was in complete control of his destiny.You stood stoic upon that rock in the sea amidst the storm, and providence rewarded you for your faith. The sailor within you, mingled with the words which you described as burning like fire before your eyes, gave you a keen sense of direction, and guided you toward a man who would later prove to be a trusted companion; and to an Island that held upon it's rugged terrain the treasures and trinkets that unlocked the endless possibilities known and unknown to man. Upon your return to Marseilles you scrupulously plotted against your conspirators, naming them and weaving your deadly thread in and out of their accursed lives with a piercing needle like a maestro.

Rome and Paris became your home, Edmond, and within those ancient cities you showed me a side to chivalry that has never before been exposed to human behavior. your elusiveness became a mask which you wore constantly, thrilling and seducing Parisian high society like a spider when it draws in it's prey. The details of your ingenious plot and the characters within it are many, and naming them would be unbecoming. But, your manner and wisdom and divinity have scarred me as you have left me speechless and numb. You have bestowed upon me the high art of nobility, erudition, and impeccable taste. I hope that in time that I can come to emulate your countenance dear Edmond, for it is otherworldly, and as you said in your letter to Maximilian; it stems from a world called grief. I shall wait and hope monsieur le Comte, for as you said; all human wisdom is contained within these two words.

Your faithful student.
Tshepo.  

Abnegation

"Selflessness and bravery aren't all that different"~Tobias Eaton. This post is dedicated to the suffering empath who literally can feel the world within their hearts and to the person who can hear the calls of help from everyone around them. It takes a real sense of courage to put oneself last when our world is so geared around the concept of self indulgence and apathy. Now, I am writing this in a most sincerer manner as I too am guilty of both as we probably all are, we are human after all. But selflessness is a trait I would definitely like to understand and emulate in more depth.

To the brave mother who would sacrifice her time for her crying child who needs and craves her attention. You are giving the world a precious gift that cannot be replaced. To the girl who can walk into a room and sense the aurora of those around her, and endeavors to ensure that everyone is included. You are inadvertently healing everyone around you. To the introvert who has a myriad of thoughts flooding his mind but who is brave enough to come of out his shell and lend a hand to an elderly person who is struggling along as they walk. To you I say, carry on! Keep being brave. The world needs you!

The inherent phenomenon of selfless can have it's drawbacks however. I say it is inherent because every single human being has this "S" gene within them, and it reveals itself in the most desperate of times. In times of great emergency or distress, I believe the human mind seems to trigger and awaken this "S" gene and causes us to commit acts of extreme bravery and strength that in hindsight seem impossible, but in the moment seem as simple as blinking. That "S" gene to me can only be described as love, as only love can trigger such reactions within the human heart and mind. It's perhaps the love for humankind, and I wonder what would happen if we could access and call upon this "S" gene at will in everything we do? I think that would be quite remarkable to witness. Now as for the drawbacks, the most obvious would be a sense of suffering and internal conflict. Now please bare with me as I use this term, as I am aware of the fact that there people out there who are truly suffering and struggling and I am cognizant of that, I am using the term because I see the selfless person as one who is willing to engage in self-denial by considering others before they consider themselves, or to lift someone up when they themselves are quite low, and that is quite courageous and shouldn't go unnoticed!

I sat one afternoon finishing up Insurgent by Veronica Roth and when I read that most Divergent initiates or transfers originated from the Abnegation faction, it all clicked! It takes an immense sense of dauntlessness to give oneself to another to a person or to a cause that one can derive little from. It takes a highly intelligent person to be able to pick up on a persons energy and empathize with their joy or sadness, and to accurately understand how to tap into that and act accordingly. And lastly, it takes a deep desire to create peace, to put oneself on the line because to an empath, a person in need is not at peace, so the selfless person seeks to restore this peace with kindness as only an honest person can.

Now as I mentioned before, I would really like to understand selflessness on a deeper level and tap into it with a balanced perspective. Like Tris and Tobias, I would like to understand why and how my mirror neurons (the tiny nerve cells located in the front of the brain, responsible for observing and imitating behavior) work they way they do, in order to use them to become more considerate, empathetic, and aware of people around me. I want to be able to access my "S" gene at will, and use it to become a better person. All is a process I've been told and so I will endeavor to hone these skills and use both in conjunction.

T.B

As If On The Wings Of An Angel

I sat on the balcony looking up at the sky which was painted a deep orange as the sun set, and I thought about Icarus and his failed attempt at reaching the heavens which he so earnestly strove for. I then thought to myself, what if he survived his burning plummet toward the Earth? What then? What if we're all like Icarus, striving ceaselessly toward our own personal Sun? Should we then all burn in a plume of flames when we fail to reach beyond the superhuman regions beyond the firmament? Of course not! We are of the stars, and it is our divine right to stretch for the that Sun, and if, and probably when we fall helplessly, we should dare to rise once more! So here is a story about an angel who has fallen from grace, which is a tribute to that unfathomable will of the human heart which pushes beyond the apparent and leans into the celestial.

The lad's wings were drenched and clung to his back in a mass of feathers, his bruised and battered knees ran pink beneath the pouring rain. "Tis but a scratch!" the young angel declared, looking to the heavens from which he fell so unceremoniously. The plummet had seen him fall through a thicket of dark clouds, where he finally clambered into the jagged branches of a great elm, which left him sprawled in a pool of mud. Rising the angel unfurled his sodden wings and whispered to himself: "We fall so that we can rise!". With his eyes set upon the Sun, unperturbed by the apparent muster of clouds that hid it from view, he leapt into the air and took flight. His splendid wings flapped incessantly against the pouring rain that seemed to cut at him in tiny blades of water. He squinted against the deluge, rising and rising. Reaching for that oft times elusive phantom called destiny.

 The clouds became darker and darker as he rose, and in his periphery, he beheld the flash of lightning that illumined the sky in a streak of light, bruising it, and leaving it purple for a time. Many of his fallen brother's and sister's had warned him of the thunder during an ascent. "When the sky turns white" they said "The Great one is warning you not to return" they finished, but the young angel paid no heed to their words of caution. His will was set in stone. The thunder cracked once more, lighting the sky, but the lad kept soaring, his wings now floating beneath the wind and the wisps of vapor that gave him speed. At length he rose above the dark muster of clouds as eagles do, and saw before him that fire in sky that he so longed for. With his eyes wide, he pulled his wings tight and gave a final flap of hope. But, to his great disappointment, as he gave his body one last jerk of speed, he was met by a flash lightning that set his beautiful wings afire. He smelt his wings burn at first, then he saw his left one ablaze before realizing the harsh truth. The senses are odd in that way, they trick you into thinking you're perfectly alright before it finally dawns on you that something is terribly wrong. The young angel then let out a cry of anguish as he fell toward that orb we call Earth yet again.

The lad now lay upon a bed of rocks, dazed and confused. He looked up and saw that the storm had given way, as the clouds seemed to rescind, leaving a beautiful ray of iridescent color that slashed across the now peach colored sky. "An omen" the angel declared "Rainbows only appear after a great storm." he finished, as he rose groggily, nursing his burned wings behind his back. "The fire from the storm may have singed my wings, but I am not burnt! The flames have simply burnt away the unnecessary feathers required for me to reach the Sun!". With that the lad endeavored to leap once more into his destiny, but he stumbled and fell into the ocean before him. After great effort he crawled ashore with his wings damp and his spirits as low as he had fallen. "The water has soothed my burns, and left me more adept at flying once they have dried!" He whispered to himself. Now dry and with faith burning fiercely in his heart he leapt once more into the sky.

His wings now cropped short seemed to carry him with greater speed than the ones heaven had seen fit to bestow upon him at his birth. He now flapped against the wind with a renewed purpose, the wind of destiny seemed carry him higher and higher as if the Sun was calling out to him. again he rose above the clouds and there saw that oft times unreachable light that burned with a never ending flame. He jerked his body once more, rendering it erect before he heard something sound in the wind: "Go on" the voice seemed to say. The boy heeded the call, because unlike the voice of his brother's and sister's below, this voice could only be heard in complete silence and only whilst in pursuit of that ever elusive phantom called destiny. Higher the young angel rose, feeling the heat of the Sun burning him slightly. The Sun's scorching rays increased in temperature the closer the angel got until he cried out in pain. The lad wanted to turn back. To return to the Earth where he felt he would be safe from the fire, but something or someone spoke to him in that moment. "Come into the fire dear boy. This fire will not burn you, it will only burn what you are not!". The angel, still writhing in pain, heeded the call of eternal wisdom, and looked dead ahead into the flames of the Sun that twisted and turned like red and orange tongues. "I shall come" Replied he "And I shall come as I was meant to come. As If On The Wings Of An Angel!"

"You're stronger than you think"

T.B.

Even when your hand shakes

Her hands began shaking again, and she could feel the anxiety creeping in like the waves on the beach she so loved to visit. Each wave of thought crept closer and closer, engulfing her in doubt, robbing her of the present moment. "Breathe" she whispered to herself, as she brought in a tray of poppies from the greenhouse. The bright sunlight that shone on her back cast iridescent rays of light on her hair which shimmered like beaten gold, causing Grace, her manager to squint against it, as she entered the shop floor. "What's the matter?" The old lady asked in the most concerned accent. "Nothing" Mary lied. "I'm just tired" she finished. Another lie. "Take those and put them on the counter" Grace replied doubtfully "There are sure to be some customers looking for these this week" she finished.

Mary obliged and made her way onto the shop floor where flowers of almost every kind filled the stands. To her left she beheld the beautiful violets and white roses that scented the isle with a concoction of sweet perfume. To her right, her eyes drank in a collage of  rich red and pink that marked the roses that were freshly delivered a week since. Presently she walked down this corridor of color until she came upon the counter where she arrayed the red poppies before the till. She then busied herself with the tulips in one corner before the bell above the door chimed, admitting a young man clothed in military attire, who strode strong and handsome within the scented shop. "Excuse me Ms." the lad said in a gentle voice. Mary looked up, dropping the tulips in her hand. She felt her heart beat a little faster and noticed the room become just a little brighter. "I'm looking for-" The young man noticed the fallen tulips before he could finish, and walked pristine toward the fumbling girl.

"Let me help you with those" the young man said flashing a smile which exposed a row of  pearl white teeth. The young girl pushed back a lock of curls behind her ear and blushed inconsolably. "Thank you" she croaked, as the young man picked the flowers from the floor still smiling. "My name is Henry" announced the young man, reaching out his hand. "I- I'm M- Mary" she stuttered as she too stretched out her trembling hand. The lad noticed her hand shake as it approached his. He clasped it with his left hand and engulfed what was left of it with his right before, looking into her hazel eyes. "Be at ease, nothing matters but this room! This very moment!" He said reassuringly. Mary's eyes began to well up before the young man said in a whisper "Sometimes we need someone to hold our hands even their shake"

In that moment Mary smiled like she hadn't  for a good while. She felt her skin tingle and she was overcome by a profound sense of clarity much  like the sun when it chases the shadows of dusk into the corners of a room. She was freed from the dark clutches of her anxiety by a kind word and a firm hand. "Even when my hand shakes" she whispered to herself, and the young man, bound by his errand procured his poppies, and left her with the gift of hope.

T.B